✌🏼What Now Jesus?
A life update
Now what Jesus? That was my prayer this morning. Stopped by the Sacred Grounds coffee shop (my new hangout) to work on some web stuff, and the owner handed me this note.
"Therefore I say to you, do not worry about your life..."
Matt. 6:25a; 27; 33-34
I’ve been hesitant to share a detailed update on the house renovation and sabbatical status. Two main reasons. First, the only direction I get in prayer is to wait and be still. Don’t ask. Second, sharing details worries our kids. Understandably.
Seeking the Kingdom first, above all else is at least a little bit crazy by the world’s standards. Crazy faith sometimes looks, well… crazy! I wouldn’t suggest anyone pack up and relocate without the resources to do what you feel led to do. But I wouldn’t trade it either.
The first couple of months were amazing. Miraculous provision day after day. I believe we were learning deeper levels of trust. Taking no thought for tomorrow had seemed like an elusive goal, but now it’s a lifestyle.
A few weeks ago, things began to shift. The more work we did on the house, the more things we found wrong. The more I worked, the more income we had, the more bills piled up. And for the first time, the deadline for a miracle passed with no miracle. Now what Jesus?
Take no thought for tomorrow. Do not worry about your life. Wait. Be still. Don't ask.
What we thought would take weeks, is now months. According to my spreadsheet, I should be a worried mess of stress. But I'm not. There's this ridiculous hope and peace. Even with new problems we've not found solutions or supplies for. Now what Jesus?
Do I really believe what I say? Do I really have the kind of faith that looks past circumstance and sees hope? Much easier when the miracles are like daily manna. But here we are, standing in the floodplains of the Jordan, promise land in sight. And the manna has stopped. (Joshua 5)
I believe with everything in me, that God is leading us and that we will "eat the fruit of the land." But there are giants there, just like the spies Joshua sent ahead reported. The question is, will we fear the giants, or have the good report that "they are bread for us." (Numbers 14:9)
What now Jesus? No matter what things look like my job right now is to be still. Finding comfort in the chaos and certainty in the uncertain. That's not sitting on my thumbs and waiting for some charity rescue. I may be a lot of things, but few have ever called me lazy.
Crazy or not. Whatever anyone else thinks. We've come too far and seen too much to give up or fear now. Kingdom first is worth the cost. Compared to Job, we are still living in Disneyland, but I stand, in faith, on what he proclaimed.
Job 13:15a (NKJV)
Though He slay me, yet will I trust Him...